Sunday, June 14, 2015

It struck me one Sunday at church that so much of what annoys, irritates, and generally drives me nuts about my life (my husband would say that isn’t a drive, but a short putt), would be fixed by my forgiving them ...

For simply not being God.

There is only one God, and I am not Him. Remember last week—I am the Lord, and there is none other.

This doesn’t stop with what I expect God to do for me. It extends to what I expect my fellow fallen human beings to do for me, as well.

Let me say right up front that I’m not talking about making excuses for, or otherwise enabling, abuse. People who have experienced abuse need to be reminded of that—the people who do hurt to you deliberately, or neglect you deliberately, need to be held accountable by someone, even if not by you. I’m talking about the thousand small things that can happen in a day ...

Other women from Bible study who don’t call to find out why you missed.

Friends who seem so busy with their own lives, they don’t stop to ask how you are.

A co-worker who preens over some reward or bonus.

A husband who doesn’t kiss you goodnight, even after being away for weeks.

I’m ashamed to say, so many times my kneejerk reaction to all this is to whine about it—at least internally.

Sometimes, though, there are good reasons—again, I’m not talking excuses here for sinful behavior—for why people act the way they do.

In the case of women’s Bible study, there are two classes, morning and evening, and we’re a growing church. People come as they can. There’s no pressure put on anyone for any of it, and for that I’m glad. I’m sure most of them, if they think of me, just figure I’m in the other time slot.

And friends—yes, we are absolutely all so busy that some days we forget to stop and make eye contact with our own children, let alone anyone outside the four walls of our homes.

The co-worker—don’t we ourselves want the freedom to rejoice openly when God blesses us in this way?

The Lord tells us to sorrow with those who do, and rejoice with those who do—there’s no caveat about being off the hook if our jealousy tells us the other person is really just bragging. Only God knows that person’s heart. (He is God, and I am not!)

The husband—in this case, mine was exhausted, sick, and barely remembered getting to bed. I was also sick and exhausted, and as I reminded myself, even more vulnerable than usual to perceived hurt. In other situations, it may be his pattern of showing affection. We all can be effusive in some ways but not others.

I have to constantly focus on the truth that while God intends the Body of Christ to serve and bless each other, there’s no one person, or group of people, who will not at some point fail us, who will always meet my needs. Sometimes God just has me wait. Sometimes He just wants me to look up and see that He is Lord, and that ultimately every need gets met at His hand.

It’s His hand we look to, then, not those of our husband, children, and friends. Love them we do, and rightly, but they are not God.
My soul, wait silently for God alone,
For my expectation is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation;
He is my defense;
I shall not be moved.
In God is my salvation and my glory;
The rock of my strength,
And my refuge, is in God.
(from Psalm 62, NKJV)
This post first appeared March 24, 2013

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